After two days of painful throat, the cough starts showing its true colour.
But, I prefer coughing than keep swallowing saliva as if it can make the pain in the throat disappear.
As far as I could remember, I had never fall sick during Ramadhan.
But, I couldn't be 100% sure, this is my first time in my entire 20++ of living.
To add another painful story, I accidentally cut my index finger while trying to pulling out ayam percik from its bamboo stick.
I were terribly shock (not really) at the sight of red blood started oozing slowly from my very thin skin. I never knew that bamboo could be as sharp as knife. Nice.
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I love writing this blog. Sometimes, I got soo many idea but then I just put it aside thinking that its quite troublesome to sit in front of the laptop only to mumbling around on some cheesy things.
After couple of months spending wee hours by day and night catching up my keep-changing-due date to complete my Master's thesis, I found writing is really much a very passive job.
I gained soo much weight during that writing period without I realised it as I never really need to walk around to do something, but solely face the screen and crack my brain.
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To be honest, the beginning to make myself giving all out commitment on writing was very difficult, harder than ever since I am at the very comfortable zone of my life.
But suddenly, the reality kicked in when I was obviously rejected by the panelist during the SPA interview. I knew I were not the chosen one immediately by the very sharp and haughty comments I got after I were literally begging for the job.
Kerja gomen siot, sape tak nak.
I were actually stop writing at all for a week before the interview in order to focus only on reading and remembering everything related to the position, only to be totally emotionally beaten up after that.
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To make this story short, I went to the counselling center in UIA since I got nightmares for one or two nights after that. I were very miserable and entirely giving up on writing after the interview.
To end the story, I managed to finish my entire thesis writing about 2 months and probably a week or two to check the format by myself and send it to my supervisors. But, the entire process to be officially finish my Master's study is still going on and may take another couple of months.
After all, I feel very grateful to Allah for granting me to be broken heart during the interview, so I got the forceful push from back to never give up and keep fighting !!!
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But, but, but the motivation dies with times and old habits relapse after that.
There will be another entry on that. Soon after this one.
